It’s weird how things you thought were bad or rude or scary, turn out to be helpful, productive, and safe. Like being yourself…
This Virgo is stepping back into her power. Virgos are not timid, shy, clean and nit-picky like many would like to believe. When we allow ourselves to step into our power we are endlessly curious, intentionally messy, undeniable geniuses, and creatures of undescribable love.
The decisions we make are based upon eons of noticing, calculating, and learning about what we don’t know. Curiously in love with the world around us, our hearts grow towards betterment in every aspect of our lives. We love to no end and our actions prove it.
So if you’ve got a Virgo in your life, hold them tight yet let them loose. They want what’s best for you and everyone around them and have the drive to get it as long as they are supported in their endeavors (send milkshakes and butt rubs!).
My life explained in a meme. Haha! No really though. I never could figure out why I was so confused all the time. Trying to figure out ME usually ended in disaster. I kept getting split right down the middle on left/right brain testing. Myers Briggs and Enegram was always tied 3 different ways. The attempts at understanding myself left me laughing at the absurdity. I was continually being called princess, high maintenance, drama queen, a walking contradiction. And that just didn’t sit quite right….
Because in reality… I am an intricate and delicate being with a keen sense of perception; constantly shifting, evolving and growing with the world around me in harmonious yet sometimes tempestuous waves. A natural being. Forever searching for equilibrium, yet yearning to get off the beaten path. Experiencing all the people, places, and things that I can in the short amount of time that we are here. Realizing it’s way too short a time to express all the love and excitement that grows inside of me. All while refusing to be pulled away from the Magic. So Yeah. I’d say they missed it just a little bit with their assumptions…. And now that I know myself a lot better, I revel in the joy it brings me to JUST BE ME.
If you are really struggling to start a new routine and feeling guilty or depressed and feeling like you “should” do yoga or stretch or etc etc…. Ask yourself, “what do I need?” Often we are avoiding a task for another reason and once we figure out what it is, we can meet our needs in order to do the new task. This could be a long or short process. With patience and kindness, one day you will just pick up the task. I’ve been feeling like I should do yoga in the morning when I wake up, but I had a STRONG avoidance to the task, even to the point of panic if I began doing yoga. My mind would go to all the times someone has said, “You should just do it anyway. It’s good for you.” And so I felt like I was doing something wrong. Yet the body has wisdom and I was learning to listen, so I continued to listen to me. I found out that what I needed was to master some other care tasks before I began doing this one. My body was wise and I listened. This morning I am waking up feeling accomplished, because I have shown myself grace, patience, and kindness. This morning I am waking up and I actually want to do yoga, so I will. We don’t have to push ourselves through everything if it’s not necessary. Sometimes we can be patient and listen to the quieter needs of ourselves and wait for growth to happen. Sometimes it’s about LOVE.
Once upon a time, someone I love called me hard headed and stubborn and I let it sink in and become a thing when I really should have said Thank You. Thank You for expressing what you think about me and Thank You for seeing the truth. I AM hard headed and stubborn and there is NOTHING wrong with that except when someone wants to take advantage of, manipulate, or control me. So when I’m hard headed and stubborn (or more accurately referred to as cautious and intelligent) I am lovingly protecting what is beautiful inside of me. The dancer, the lover, the dreamer, the healer, the child. And that is definitely worth being stubborn over. In fact, I fought a war over it. About 10 years ago, I needed a spark to light my flame and now I light my own way and I am so grateful to be on this journey. I thought I was having trouble connecting to others and the real root of it all was, I was no longer connected to myself because I put her aside to play nice and try to be perfect. Don’t worry. She’s back. She’s loud. She likes to climb trees and jump out of shadows, splash in rain puddles and sass you all the way to the bank. Love you. Mean it. Have an awesome day. 🙏💩🦌❤️
I’ve been feeling very disconnected and raw as of late, for years really, but I am still seeing tiny glimmers of me poping up at random times and it feels like home. That’s what home is. It’s in you. For me, watching specific movies has helped me find her. Movies about family, healing, courage, overcoming obstacles, and acceptance. Tonight it was a movie called Queen. While watching, I started to feel funny (happy) and laugh a lot (whoa) and have warm feelings in my heart (mmm) and a I got a serious itch to dance (freedom!) The moral of this story is…. Drag Queens will Save Your Life. And that’s all for my Ted Talk…
I have been sick for what seems like forever. And ever. Starting years ago and becoming acute within the last year. It does seem to be very slowly getting better; but with the extended illness, ongoing pain, loss of friend support, and inability to live a normal life… I began to lose sight of my dreams. So, today I want to revisit them in loving honor of adventure and wonder, because soon I’ll be back at it. I can feel it!
Visit and/or move to the Pacific Northwest and go whale watching. (Thanks for this inspiration Netta!)
Move out of the city to a quiet place with trees and birds and a place to wander peacefully every day. No mold. And a fence for my dog beast.
Plant beautiful gardens of flowers and edible plants and herbs and share the wealth with my friends and loved ones.
Regain my health and run through the trees to see waterfalls!!
Learn a trade in which I make enough money to live comfortably, work remotely, and fulfill my dreams while being able to obtain the things I need to stay healthy. I’ll also need enough income to share with my friends and loved ones because it’s no fun adventuring alone. ☺️
TRAVEL TRAVEL TRAVEL
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I know there’s more…. But all I can think about now is plant babies. 😂
I find it incredibly cruel to insist upon calmness and positivity from someone who is currently triggered. It’s like a slap in the face to an already disregulated nervous system, asking for more energy from a maxed out platform. We can be better friends and confidants if we can ask ourselves to listen without taking the volume or choice of words personally unless it is directed toward us. I find often, it’s more of an explosion of emotion from holding them within or having to undergo a long term stressful situation. If we can’t handle the extra energy ourselves, we can create a loving boundary stating that fact rather than insist the other person must change, which can make them feel wrong or unloved. We can be kinder this way and allow our loved ones to express themselves freely and heal, while also creating more connection. We can all do our part of the work. It makes us all grow!
30 minutes later, he’s safe. He almost drowned in the kitchen sink probably innocently trying to get a drink of water and then my giant purple microfiber cloth wiped him off into oblivion. Yet he survived from his superior survival mechanisms. I smelled his wonderful alarm stench while I washing my dishes….. Now these are the thoughts that ran through my mind as I sniffed and tried to locate my fallen homie. ‘Stinky? Where are you friend?’ … ‘Did I wipe you into a stinky grave of dishwater and old food? I’m a terrible friend’ … ‘ARE ALL MY DISHES GOING TO SMELL LIKE THIS FOREVERRRR?’… ‘What is your Uncle Frank going to think?’
Thought Bubbles From the Blanket Fort 
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