Snow Daze

I’m here. I’m breathing. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to be doing. NOTHING I suppose. This is definitely way better than facing the threat of getting my face blown off every day, yet since that threat isn’t there at the moment, I feel all kinds of discontent for my position. In an attempt to make my life better through chasing sparkles, danger, excitement, happiness, love, (ALL THE THINGS!), I successfully made it stay exactly the way it was before. Empty. None of those things stood a chance of filling me up, because there is something very much more important missing. An enormous, gaping ravine of nothingnes begging to be violated over and over until the tears stop and the body begins to move. “Come on body, just move.” Nothing….
What to do? ANYTHING. There it is again. Just do something. Get moving. Make the gears turn. Make the muscles move. It’s medicine.
I see this pattern repeated continuously through many of the faces I see throughout life every day. My family, friends, coworkers, acquaintances, even the cashier at the local coffee shop. Emptiness. Lack of being full. Something missing for this heart to be whole. The want to be free, for just a little while, of the chase that seems to be never ending.
And I will tell you now, that I have no answers. I wish I did. I can’t figure this one out. How can I have what I need and be so completely aloof? Why do those little voices say such mean things when I am aimlessly floating around the ethereal simply trying to get my groove on. Maybe they are jealous. Maybe they are just jerks. Or maybe they are me. Trying to tell myself to aim higher, do better, love harder. Even at the expense of me. I know that’s kinda silly. Me destroys Me. Now there’s a truth that isn’t spoken enough.

Advertisements

Aside

3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. galactic
    Jan 21, 2016 @ 19:52:08

    Hey sweet! Form is emptiness, emptiness is form 🙂 The vessel needs to be empty to be able to receive goodness.
    Those voices – we all have them. They are no better or worse than any others. What you choose to believe is what becomes true. So when they bother you, don’t feel bad, judge yourself, or react, just say “no thanks!” or “uncreate, delete, destory that energy through all time, space, dimensions and reality!”
    Do it enough times til it works. Your reality will respond.
    You are rad. Keep on with the magic.

    Like

    Reply

  2. galactic
    Jan 21, 2016 @ 19:54:59

    p.s. – it’s destory, not destroy, because you’re taking the story out of your reality field and allowing the energy to become neutral.
    In other words, when you destory something, you let go of all the stories you’ve told yourself about what that thing means (“I’m bad!, everything’s ruined!”, etc.) and just letting it BE. Just observing. Letting it pass like a fish in the river… wait long enough and it swims away!
    LOVE.

    Like

    Reply

  3. Tamberine Cloudmonster
    Jan 14, 2017 @ 16:09:27

    Hey Galactic. Do I know you? Can we hang out in real life? 😀

    Like

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: